Celebrating Dad

Our Dad truly was a superhero and when he crossed from this life into the afterlife, he left an unimaginable void in our lives. He left us many weeks before his actual death in April, experiencing what his doctor called “degenerative dementia.” So in the end we had a medical term for what had happened to Dad, though what we really wanted was a reason. There was no reason, but in an odd twist of reality, the dementia prepared us all for Dad’s leaving and it was a blessing.

Dad’s life story was built on a heart-breaking fact that haunted him his entire life. When Dad was five years old, his father left Dad’s mother and their five children because he did not want a family anymore. Dad never got over that loss and he spent his life becoming the man his father was not – a kind, gentle and very loving son, husband, father, grandfather, brother, uncle, and friend. Dad’s superpower was love and he was always happiest – literally beaming – when he was with his wife and his family.

Our family has been celebrating Dad’s long and wonderful life in the usual ways…telling and retelling our favorite stories, looking through old photographs, praying, and doing the one thing Dad would expect… rallying around Mom to love and support her as she re-orients herself to a life in which her loving husband of 66 years is not physically present, but still with her. On Mom’s birthday, just two weeks ago, Dad used his superpower in an unmistakable and undeniable way.

For many, many years, Dad bought flowers for Mom’s birthday. He would not have the flowers delivered to the house, but would go to a florist or other store, select the flowers he wanted Mom to have, and take them home to her. And if it were a weekend day, he would also stop to buy her coffee. Dad was a tea drinker, but he made coffee for Mom every weekday morning, and then often bought her coffee on weekends.

Two weeks ago, without knowing that it was Mom’s birthday, one of Dad’s very few surviving friends arrived on Saturday morning with flowers and coffee for Mom. What a beautiful surprise. Who but a loving superhero could have made THAT happen?

Thank you so much, Dad! We all love you very, very much and are deeply grateful to you for your many lessons about the power of love and devotion.

45 Responses to Celebrating Dad

  1. Jamila July 31, 2018 at 3:16 pm #

    Dear Sharon,
    It’s been a whirlwind few weeks finishing our time in Montreal and traveling to Halifax. When I received your email with a tribute to your Dad, I decided to wait until I had a quiet moment to read it because I knew that it wasn’t to be read in a hurry. I am glad that I did wait until today because I was moved by your writing, so heartfelt and so very honest, honoring your Dad in the most loving way.
    Thank you for sharing with us all a life experience that is so difficult, and yet so very full of love. Your Dad’s legacy is alive and well in his wonderful daughter!
    Much love always,
    Jamila

    • sharon August 1, 2018 at 11:17 pm #

      Thank you so much for your very kind comments, Jamila. As the days go by, we experience our connection with Dad in different and meaningful ways – especially Mom, who feels his presence with her daily. My hope is that I will be able to console others through their losses as so many wonderful people have consoled me and our family. Thank you for sending so much love. It is gratefully received and returned.

      Sharon

  2. Gina Auriemma July 17, 2018 at 11:37 am #

    Dearest Sharon:
    My condolences on the loss of your Superhero Dad. You were very lucky to have him in your life. He obviously taught you to be the loving, sensitive and compassionate person that you are. Thank you for sharing this lovely story. It gave me a moment to pause and think of my own Superhero Dad who we lost 18 years ago.
    Sending thoughts and hugs to you.

    Gina

    • sharon July 17, 2018 at 1:04 pm #

      Oh, Gina, thank you so much for your kind words, thoughts and hugs. I join you in celebrating YOUR Superhero Dad, too.

      With love and big hugs,

      Sharon

  3. B. Elbertson July 16, 2018 at 11:59 am #

    Sharon,
    So very sorry to hear about the loss of your father. Loss is never easy under any circumstances but how wonderful it is to have family and friends to help you through this difficult time. I lost my parents some time ago and I can honestly say they are always with me.

    Barbara

    • sharon July 17, 2018 at 12:58 pm #

      Thank you very much, Barbara. Yes, I feel very blessed to have family and friends who understand. It is wonderful to know that you still feel your parents with you.

      Sending a big hug,

      Sharon

  4. Clara July 11, 2018 at 4:04 am #

    Sharon,
    so sorry to hear that your amazing super hero dad passed away. I still remember you call your mom every day every same time to share your love , which inspired me a lot. Since then I am trying to follow your way but I am not a good daughter as you are. I will pray for your father & your family. I am sure your father will keep loving your family in heaven forever. Missing you sharon

    • sharon July 11, 2018 at 6:43 pm #

      Such a wonderful surprise to hear from you again, Clara, and from so far away. I miss you, too, and know that you are a very special person. Thank you so much for your kind words and your prayers. Sending love and a big hug!

      Sharon

  5. Mary July 10, 2018 at 1:36 pm #

    Sharon – I just had to reply to your beautiful post, it truly warmed my heart.

    Do you remember our recent phone conversation when we talked about how our loved ones that have crossed over, come to us in our dreams? Ironically, I had a dream about my Dad last night and when I woke up this morning, our “visit” was still fresh in my mind as if we just spent time together. To reinforce my belief even further, I received this wonderful message from you today about your Dad’s superpower!

    Thanks so much for this gift, Sharon.

    All my love,
    Mary

    • sharon July 10, 2018 at 7:28 pm #

      Oh, Mary, what a sweet message. I love that you had another visit with your Dad and am so grateful to you for sharing it with us. It’s a beautiful story and a gift for us all.

      Sending lots of love and big hugs,

      Sharon

  6. Nicole Black July 10, 2018 at 11:11 am #

    Sharon what a beautiful tribute! Im sending prayers and hugs that the memories give you joy. My mother is in the midst of Alzheimers; and I am counting my blessings for each new memory that we are able to create to sustain me for the inevitable.

    Peace light and blessings

    • sharon July 10, 2018 at 7:36 pm #

      Thank you very much for your prayers and hugs, Nicole. I am so grateful to receive them, and send prayers and hugs back to you as you navigate through your Mom’s situation. Love this thought – “I am counting my blessings for each new memory that we are able to create.”

      With love and compassion

      Sharon

  7. Maria Rivera July 10, 2018 at 10:10 am #

    I’m so happy he has presented himself that you, your family and especially your mom may know he is always with you! My superhero is also with me and my family, in many ways and makes himself known quite often. It’s a child-like calm when he’s around and I know you understand what I mean, Sharon. Feel him and know ypu are blessed!
    Hugs and tons of kisses!
    Maria

    • sharon July 10, 2018 at 7:39 pm #

      Maria, thanks so much for sharing your story about the presence of your superhero in your life. And yes, I know I am blessed. The hugs and “tons of kisses” are so gratefully received and returned with love.

      oxoxo

      Sharon

  8. Peg July 9, 2018 at 3:31 pm #

    Sharon,

    This is a beautiful tribute to your father – who clearly leaves behind a wonderful legacy of love from the life he lived. I am so glad that you are able to notice the love is still there. That is grace. xo

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 11:31 pm #

      Peg, thank you so much. Yes, it is grace, indeed!

      Sending a big hug,

      Sharon

  9. Carol Moorhead July 9, 2018 at 2:55 pm #

    Sharon, I am so very sorry to hear of your Dad passing. Wonderful memories certainly help us through these difficult times. I am so glad you and your family have these memories. My Dad is gone 7 years now and not a day goes by that he doesn’t make me smile. I wish you and your family the same. Sending hugs, Carol

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 11:28 pm #

      Thank you so much for these encouraging words, Carol. I love that your Dad is still making you smile! Hugs gratefully received and returned.

      oxoxo

      Sharon

  10. Heather Dupre July 9, 2018 at 12:28 pm #

    Dear Sharon,
    I’m so sorry to hear about your Dad’s passing. I loved hearing about this “surprise” that truly was rooted in the love carried on by spirit. I lost my dad when he was only 76 and my mom 2 years ago (who also suffered from dementia). Our visit is overdue…this year for sure! Hugs, Heather

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 1:44 pm #

      Dear Heather, I love your expression “love carried on by spirit” and did not know that your Mom crossed over two years ago. I hope you still feel her love…and I am sending mine!

      oxoxo

      Sharon

  11. candidkay July 9, 2018 at 11:46 am #

    Oh, this brought tears to my eyes! My father used to give my mother yellow roses–and I picture him still doing so in the afterlife. I’m so glad your dad found a way to continue his tradition:).

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 1:40 pm #

      Thanks very much for your comment, Candid Kay, and for sharing your story! May the love, the roses, and the other traditions continue!

      oxoxo

      Sharon

  12. Terry July 9, 2018 at 11:20 am #

    Sharon, this brought a tear to my eye. Yes, he was certainly with your mom on her birthday for sure. Hugs to you.

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 11:33 am #

      Terry, thank you so much for your comment and the hugs! Sending hugs to you, too!

      Sharon

  13. MJ Higgins July 9, 2018 at 10:32 am #

    Oh Sharon, I am truly sorry to hear of the passing of your dad. There is nothing quite like that loss. I was also fortunate to have a wonderful loving dad. It’s been 24 years since we lost him. One thing is very clear, your dad’s love and spirit are alive within you. It shows in everything you do and say and in all the lives you touch with your love. I believe that is his greatest legacy. Sending hugs and positive thoughts your way.

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 11:30 am #

      Thank you so much for your kind words, MJ, and for the hugs and positive thoughts. I am grateful and send hugs in return!

      oxoxo

      Sharon

    • Author July 9, 2018 at 11:30 am #

      ❤️

  14. Abbey July 9, 2018 at 9:40 am #

    Hugs, thoughts and prayers to you and your family, Sharon. What a beautiful story. He sounds like an incredible man.

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 11:34 pm #

      Thanks very much, Abbey. Greatly appreciate the hugs, thoughts and prayers for our family.

      oxox

      Sharon

  15. Emily Chu July 9, 2018 at 7:52 am #

    Dear Sharon – Thank you for sharing such a beautiful story. He sounded like a very special and wonderful man with forever lasting love for his wife and family. Take good care. Big hugs!

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 8:09 am #

      Yes, Emily, Dad was (and is) a very special soul. Thank you so much for your message and for the hugs – they are so gratefully received and returned!

      Sharon

  16. Amy Jumbelic July 9, 2018 at 7:02 am #

    Sharon – I am so sorry to see this. I didn’t realize your Dad passed – so sorry. This is such a nice story, I love it! Sending a big hugs and prayers to you and your Mom and superDad!!

    Love
    Amy

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 8:05 am #

      Thanks very much, Amy! Hugs and prayers for our family gratefully received. Hope you and your family are having a great summer!

      Sharon

  17. Virginie July 9, 2018 at 6:24 am #

    Sharon I am so sorry to read the news your Dad passed away. What a beautiful message you wrote!!
    When I started reading I remembered the book you were reading in our trip to Cezch Republic, do you? Many lives many masters by Brian Weiss.
    It has been a faboulus reading at many levels and I am still reflecting on some aspects of it. It helped me a lot last year when Grandpa and Grandma passed away too.
    Love you Sharon

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 6:35 am #

      Hello, Virginie! Yes, I recently re-read Many Lives, Many Masters and have found it helpful and intriguing. Grateful for your love and sending some back to you with, of course, a big hug.

      Sharon

  18. Denna July 9, 2018 at 6:23 am #

    Hi Sharon, this was so beautiful. We can only hope that this is how our family remembers us after we are no longer here physically. Keeping you and your family in my prayers.

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 6:37 am #

      Thank you so very much, Denna. Sending love and a big hug!

      Sharon

  19. Laura Nel July 9, 2018 at 6:11 am #

    Ah … he sounds like a really special man who has left a strong legacy. Sending you hugs xx

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 6:25 am #

      Thank you very much for the hugs, Laura! They are gratefully received and returned.

      Sharon

  20. Author July 9, 2018 at 6:00 am #

    LOVE is the greatest gift. Wishing you and your family strength, peace and LOVE.

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 6:27 am #

      Author, thank you so much! Yes, LOVE is the greatest gift. Yours is gratefully received and returned… with a hug, of course.

      Sharon

  21. Jacqueline Glass July 9, 2018 at 5:28 am #

    Thank you for sharing such a loving tribute. My prayers go out to you and your family. I see that you get the wonderful loving spirit from your Dad. What an awesome legacy of love that he leaves to you.

    • sharon July 9, 2018 at 6:29 am #

      Jacqueline, thanks very much for your prayers – they are gratefully received. Sending love and a hug!

      Sharon

  22. Claudia Schmidt July 2, 2018 at 3:36 pm #

    What a beautiful tribute to a wonderful man, Sharon. Brought tears to my eyes. Sending hugs xo

    • sharon July 2, 2018 at 6:58 pm #

      Thanks very much, Claudia! Hugs gratefully received and returned!

      Sharon

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