June was an emotionally challenging month for me. The “why” does not seem that important, other than to say that four events stirred up residual grief and sadness that I had repressed and tried to ignore. So, two weeks ago, I decided it was time to do something to explore the emotional aches hidden deep inside, and I committed to writing an “I release…” statement every day for twenty-one consecutive days. Here is what I have already learned…
… Writing each day about what I am choosing to release, even if the time spent writing is very brief, has helped me return to my usual state of optimism. I am very grateful for that.
… Realizations are surfacing about past relationships and events that are never top-of-mind for me, but that hold unresolved feelings. Once these situations surface in my writing, I have been able to understand them in a new light and then let them go.
… In some cases, my sadness was linked to relatively recent life events – the death of my Dad in 2018 and my Mom in 2019 – but in other cases the source of sadness went back many years.
… What I believed to be the source of sadness was often not. Some explanations I had long given myself for why a situation was painful have turned out to be a superficial understanding of the causes. This seems to have been the case, for example, in a friendship I ended with a super-critical and judgmental friend.
Day by day, I am understanding how much of the past I have been lugging around with me, and how exhausting that is. In a conversation with a dear friend this week, we realized – together – that she, too, was carrying the burden of past decisions and events she thought had been resolved. They were not, and I understood in a new way how common it is for us to carry burdens we could choose to let go.
I hope you will share how YOU release the past, and I am looking forward to even lighter, brighter days ahead.
Image credit: © Alina Datsyuk | Dreamstime.com