Rediscovering Joy

Many years ago I discovered a photo that made my heart smile.  My mom or dad had taken it at the very moment I discovered a new rocking horse on Christmas morning.  I was not yet three years old and if you saw the photo you would agree that this little girl was in a state of absolute joy.  Years passed and I forgot about the photo and, if I am truly honest with myself, I must admit that I also forgot about that joyful girl I once was.

Then, about ten years ago I remembered that photo and the next time I visited my parents house I sat on the floor outside the small linen closet in the hallway and went through a pile of old photographs of my brother, parents, grandmothers, aunts, uncles and cousins.  Finally, I saw her – the girl in the stripped pajamas – and studied every detail.  I placed the photo on the floor beside me, replaced the many other photos in the closet, and went to show my parents.  The next week I had a copy made and framed it, looking at it from time to time.  One day a few years later I picked it up and felt very, very sad.  What had happened to that girl?  Where was that sheer joy?  Why didn’t I feel it in that moment…or ever?  I realized that more than anything I wanted to be that “me” again.

It has been a challenging and fascinating journey, sometimes exhilarating and sometimes painful.  And while I may not yet have arrived, I am so much closer than I have been at any time since I was that child in red and white striped pajamas.  The term “journey” is over-used but I do not know a better way to describe my search for me.  It was and is a journey of self-discovery, of self-appreciation and, ultimately, of self-love.

If you have been drawn to this website, you can make it better and more relevant.  Women love to share and to help each other.   I am not an expert in human behavior or psychology or new age anything, but I love learning, exploring, sharing and evolving into to the most joyful me possible.  If you have found this website, I am sure that you have something to offer other women on their journey.  Please share it with us!

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