My dear friend Emma* is making a career switch and has been interviewing for jobs in fields that have long interested her. In describing the process, she told me that one perspective employer had her “jumping through hoops” with continually changing requirements. After our call, I thought a lot about Emma’s use of that particular expression and about how most people I know, including me, are jumping through hoops on a daily basis. Often, we …
Early in my career, I worked with an abrasive man who was almost always angry at me. He was angry at everything I represented as a woman in the workplace, and furious enough to raise his voice whenever he spoke to me. But it is not his anger that made a lasting impression on me, it is a simple expression of his, one that has served me well since. In a meeting with this man, …
A recent interaction with a young mom has me thinking a great deal about our reflexive reluctance to accept even the simplest form of help when it is offered. My brief exchange with this woman made a lasting impression. Dave and I had walked into town for lunch and as we approached our destination, I noticed a young woman pushing an old-fashioned, larger-than-usual baby carriage. The woman was walking towards us and when she was …
Most of us welcome a New Year and the opportunity to focus on what we love about our life and also on what could be better. New Year’s resolutions offer a tool to begin re-creating our life by defining and pursuing what we truly want and deserve. In some aspects of our life, all we need is a bit of fine-tuning, while other aspects may require major revamping. Much has been written about how effective …
We create and re-create our life in the stories we tell others about ourselves and in the stories we tell ourselves. Several years ago I heard Ben Zander, conductor of The Boston Philharmonic Orchestra, speak about the impact of our answer to a simple question most of us are asked many times each day – “How are you?” As we reply to this question from others, we also signal to ourselves how we feel about …
I have had the very good fortune over the past month to meet or to reconnect with several women who inspire me and from whom I have learned (and continue to learn) a great deal. And while I was not searching for a unifying theme for my conversations with these wonderful women, one eventually did emerge. Each of these women is facing the decision to end a relationship – a friendship, a job, a family …
I recently met a young woman who is making a significant difference in her community, a woman who is helping people transform their lives. If you had been listening to our conversation, it is unlikely you would have known how amazing Anna is. Hearing her describe herself and her work, you might have been underwhelmed. But I knew something about Anna before meeting her, and in our conversation it was clear that her inner-critic was …
Recent conversations with four friends from different walks of life left me wondering what happened to our collective ability to utter that very simple, two-letter word that could help make life so much less complicated. Anyone who has been around a toddler for even a few moments understands the effectiveness of an emphatic, fully-committed “no.” So how have we lost this reflexive response when faced with a request for which we have little time or …
In recent weeks I have been watching as two very dear friends navigate the emotions that result from deceit, betrayal, and destruction of the deep trust they shared. It is painful to observe their drama play out and, most obviously, extremely painful for them to live it each day. Everyone one of us has experienced betrayal of some kind, and the very word often evokes a physical response in our gut. Memories can flood back …
I was very happy to kiss 2014 goodbye. It was a year of many lessons, some that I would have opted to skip had I had the chance. Like all years, it was full of joys and sorrows (including the loss of a much beloved aunt), and many wonderful “new beginnings.” All in all, it was a very good year. There were situations I could have handled better, of course, and 2015 offers another opportunity …
